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|00000dd0| 00 0a 41 20 63 61 6e 20 | 6f 66 20 41 53 50 41 52 |..A can |of ASPAR|
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|00001090| 74 68 6f 75 67 68 20 49 | 20 64 6f 6e 27 74 20 6b |though I| don't k|
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|000011a0| 20 50 41 52 4b 49 4e 47 | 20 53 50 41 43 45 21 21 | PARKING| SPACE!!|
|000011b0| 00 0a 41 6d 20 49 20 53 | 48 4f 50 4c 49 46 54 49 |..Am I S|HOPLIFTI|
|000011c0| 4e 47 3f 00 0a 41 6d 20 | 49 20 61 63 63 6f 6d 70 |NG?..Am |I accomp|
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|00001220| 0a 41 6d 65 72 69 63 61 | 21 21 20 20 49 20 73 61 |.America|!!  I sa|
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|00001270| 20 74 75 62 65 20 6f 66 | 20 55 48 46 20 6f 62 6c | tube of| UHF obl|
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|000012c0| 21 20 20 44 69 64 20 79 | 6f 75 20 42 55 59 20 61 |!  Did y|ou BUY a|
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|00001320| 0a 41 6e 20 61 69 72 20 | 6f 66 20 46 52 45 4e 43 |.An air |of FRENC|
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|00001360| 2c 20 6d 79 20 62 6f 77 | 6c 69 6e 67 20 61 76 65 |, my bow|ling ave|
|00001370| 72 61 67 65 20 69 73 20 | 75 6e 69 6d 70 65 61 63 |rage is |unimpeac|
|00001380| 68 61 62 6c 65 21 21 21 | 00 0a 41 72 65 20 77 65 |hable!!!|..Are we|
|00001390| 20 54 48 45 52 45 20 79 | 65 74 3f 00 0a 41 72 65 | THERE y|et?..Are|
|000013a0| 20 77 65 20 54 48 45 52 | 45 20 79 65 74 3f 20 20 | we THER|E yet?  |
|000013b0| 4d 79 20 4d 49 4e 44 20 | 69 73 20 61 20 53 55 42 |My MIND |is a SUB|
|000013c0| 4d 41 52 49 4e 45 21 21 | 00 0a 41 72 65 20 77 65 |MARINE!!|..Are we|
|000013d0| 20 6c 69 76 65 20 6f 72 | 20 6f 6e 20 74 61 70 65 | live or| on tape|
|000013e0| 3f 00 0a 41 72 65 20 77 | 65 20 6f 6e 20 53 54 52 |?..Are w|e on STR|
|000013f0| 49 4b 45 20 79 65 74 3f | 00 0a 41 72 65 20 79 6f |IKE yet?|..Are yo|
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|00001410| 61 74 20 50 69 7a 7a 61 | 20 48 75 74 3f 3f 00 0a |at Pizza| Hut??..|
|00001420| 41 72 65 20 79 6f 75 20 | 73 65 6c 6c 69 6e 67 20 |Are you |selling |
|00001430| 4e 59 4c 4f 4e 20 4f 49 | 4c 20 57 45 4c 4c 53 3f |NYLON OI|L WELLS?|
|00001440| 3f 20 20 49 66 20 73 6f | 2c 20 77 65 20 63 61 6e |?  If so|, we can|
|00001450| 20 75 73 65 20 54 57 4f | 20 44 4f 5a 45 4e 21 21 | use TWO| DOZEN!!|
|00001460| 00 0a 41 72 65 20 79 6f | 75 20 73 74 69 6c 6c 20 |..Are yo|u still |
|00001470| 61 6e 20 41 4c 43 4f 48 | 4f 4c 49 43 3f 00 0a 41 |an ALCOH|OLIC?..A|
|00001480| 73 20 50 72 65 73 69 64 | 65 6e 74 20 49 20 68 61 |s Presid|ent I ha|
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|000014a0| 6d 79 20 63 6f 69 6e 20 | 63 6f 6c 6c 65 63 74 69 |my coin |collecti|
|000014b0| 6f 6e 21 00 0a 41 77 72 | 69 67 68 74 2c 20 77 68 |on!..Awr|ight, wh|
|000014c0| 69 63 68 20 6f 6e 65 20 | 6f 66 20 79 6f 75 20 68 |ich one |of you h|
|000014d0| 69 64 20 6d 79 20 50 45 | 4e 49 53 20 45 4e 56 59 |id my PE|NIS ENVY|
|000014e0| 3f 00 0a 42 41 52 42 41 | 52 41 20 53 54 41 4e 57 |?..BARBA|RA STANW|
|000014f0| 59 43 4b 20 6d 61 6b 65 | 73 20 6d 65 20 6e 65 72 |YCK make|s me ner|
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|00001510| 20 54 68 61 74 20 77 61 | 73 20 74 68 65 20 6d 6f | That wa|s the mo|
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|00001530| 20 72 65 6e 64 69 74 69 | 6f 6e 20 6f 66 0a 20 60 | renditi|on of. `|
|00001540| 60 49 20 44 49 44 20 49 | 54 20 4d 59 20 57 41 59 |`I DID I|T MY WAY|
|00001550| 27 27 20 49 27 76 65 20 | 65 76 65 72 20 68 65 61 |'' I've |ever hea|
|00001560| 72 64 21 21 00 0a 42 45 | 4c 41 20 4c 55 47 4f 53 |rd!!..BE|LA LUGOS|
|00001570| 49 20 69 73 20 6d 79 20 | 63 6f 2d 70 69 6c 6f 74 |I is my |co-pilot|
|00001580| 2e 2e 00 0a 42 49 2d 42 | 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 2d |....BI-B|I-BI-BI-|
|00001590| 42 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 | 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 |BI-BI-BI|-BI-BI-B|
|000015a0| 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 2d | 42 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 |I-BI-BI-|BI-BI-BI|
|000015b0| 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 | 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 2d |-BI-BI-B|I-BI-BI-|
|000015c0| 42 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 | 2d 42 49 2d 42 49 2d 42 |BI-BI-BI|-BI-BI-B|
|000015d0| 49 2d 00 0a 42 61 72 62 | 69 65 20 73 61 79 73 2c |I-..Barb|ie says,|
|000015e0| 20 54 61 6b 65 20 71 75 | 61 61 6c 75 64 65 73 20 | Take qu|aaludes |
|000015f0| 69 6e 20 67 69 6e 20 61 | 6e 64 20 67 6f 20 74 6f |in gin a|nd go to|
|00001600| 20 61 20 64 69 73 63 6f | 20 72 69 67 68 74 20 61 | a disco| right a|
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|00001620| 79 73 2c 20 57 4f 4f 2d | 57 4f 4f 21 21 20 20 4e |ys, WOO-|WOO!!  N|
|00001630| 6f 20 63 72 65 64 69 74 | 20 61 74 20 60 60 4d 72 |o credit| at ``Mr|
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|00001670| 54 49 56 45 20 61 73 20 | 61 20 54 41 54 54 4f 4f |TIVE as |a TATTOO|
|00001680| 45 44 20 4b 4e 4f 43 4b | 57 55 52 53 54 2e 00 0a |ED KNOCK|WURST...|
|00001690| 42 6f 20 44 65 72 65 6b | 20 72 75 69 6e 65 64 20 |Bo Derek| ruined |
|000016a0| 6d 79 20 6c 69 66 65 21 | 00 0a 42 6f 79 2c 20 61 |my life!|..Boy, a|
|000016b0| 6d 20 49 20 67 6c 61 64 | 20 69 74 27 73 20 6f 6e |m I glad| it's on|
|000016c0| 6c 79 20 31 39 37 31 2e | 2e 2e 00 0a 42 6f 79 73 |ly 1971.|....Boys|
|000016d0| 2c 20 79 6f 75 20 68 61 | 76 65 20 41 4c 4c 20 62 |, you ha|ve ALL b|
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|00001700| 20 69 6e 20 31 35 20 6d | 69 6e 75 74 65 73 21 21 | in 15 m|inutes!!|
|00001710| 00 0a 42 75 74 20 77 61 | 73 20 68 65 20 6d 61 74 |..But wa|s he mat|
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|00001730| 6e 69 67 68 74 20 61 74 | 20 74 68 65 20 6c 65 73 |night at| the les|
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|00001750| 00 0a 43 48 55 42 42 59 | 20 43 48 45 43 4b 45 52 |..CHUBBY| CHECKER|
|00001760| 20 6a 75 73 74 20 68 61 | 64 20 61 20 43 48 49 43 | just ha|d a CHIC|
|00001770| 4b 45 4e 20 53 41 4e 44 | 57 49 43 48 20 69 6e 20 |KEN SAND|WICH in |
|00001780| 64 6f 77 6e 74 6f 77 6e | 20 44 55 4c 55 54 48 21 |downtown| DULUTH!|
|00001790| 00 0a 43 4f 4e 47 52 41 | 54 55 4c 41 54 49 4f 4e |..CONGRA|TULATION|
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|000017b0| 20 6d 61 6b 65 20 74 68 | 69 6e 6c 79 20 76 65 69 | make th|inly vei|
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|00001850| 4e 20 43 41 4b 45 3f 00 | 0a 43 61 74 73 75 70 20 |N CAKE?.|.Catsup |
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|000018b0| 20 20 41 6e 79 77 61 79 | 2c 20 69 74 20 6b 65 65 |  Anyway|, it kee|
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|000018d0| 65 61 72 20 74 68 65 20 | 6c 61 75 6e 64 72 6f 6d |ear the |laundrom|
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|00001930| 6c 69 27 6c 20 43 41 52 | 54 4f 4f 4e 20 47 55 59 |li'l CAR|TOON GUY|
|00001940| 53 21 0a 20 52 65 6d 65 | 6d 62 65 72 20 74 68 65 |S!. Reme|mber the|
|00001950| 20 53 45 52 49 41 4c 20 | 4e 55 4d 42 45 52 53 21 | SERIAL |NUMBERS!|
|00001960| 21 20 20 46 6f 6c 6c 6f | 77 20 74 68 65 20 57 48 |!  Follo|w the WH|
|00001970| 49 50 50 4c 45 20 41 56 | 45 20 45 58 49 54 21 21 |IPPLE AV|E EXIT!!|
|00001980| 0a 20 48 61 76 65 20 61 | 20 46 52 45 45 20 50 45 |. Have a| FREE PE|
|00001990| 50 53 49 21 21 20 20 54 | 75 72 6e 20 4c 45 46 54 |PSI!!  T|urn LEFT|
|000019a0| 20 61 74 20 74 68 27 48 | 4f 4c 49 44 41 59 20 49 | at th'H|OLIDAY I|
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|00001a20| 52 4d 20 73 68 65 64 73 | 20 54 41 52 54 41 52 20 |RM sheds| TARTAR |
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|00001a40| 27 20 62 79 20 31 30 27 | 27 20 47 4c 4f 53 53 59 |' by 10'|' GLOSSY|
|00001a50| 2e 2e 00 0a 43 6f 75 6c | 64 20 49 20 68 61 76 65 |....Coul|d I have|
|00001a60| 20 61 20 64 72 75 67 20 | 6f 76 65 72 64 6f 73 65 | a drug |overdose|
|00001a70| 3f 00 0a 44 49 44 49 2e | 2e 2e 20 20 69 73 20 74 |?..DIDI.|..  is t|
|00001a80| 68 61 74 20 61 20 4d 41 | 52 54 49 41 4e 20 6e 61 |hat a MA|RTIAN na|
|00001a90| 6d 65 2c 20 6f 72 2c 20 | 61 72 65 20 77 65 20 69 |me, or, |are we i|
|00001aa0| 6e 20 49 53 52 41 45 4c | 3f 00 0a 44 4f 4e 27 54 |n ISRAEL|?..DON'T|
|00001ab0| 20 67 6f 21 21 20 20 49 | 27 6d 20 6e 6f 74 20 48 | go!!  I|'m not H|
|00001ac0| 4f 57 41 52 44 20 43 4f | 53 45 4c 4c 21 21 20 20 |OWARD CO|SELL!!  |
|00001ad0| 49 20 6b 6e 6f 77 20 50 | 4f 4c 49 53 48 20 4a 4f |I know P|OLISH JO|
|00001ae0| 4b 45 53 2e 2e 2e 20 20 | 57 41 49 54 21 21 0a 20 |KES...  |WAIT!!. |
|00001af0| 44 6f 6e 27 74 20 67 6f | 21 21 20 20 49 20 41 4d |Don't go|!!  I AM|
|00001b00| 20 48 6f 77 61 72 64 20 | 43 6f 73 65 6c 6c 21 2e | Howard |Cosell!.|
|00001b10| 2e 2e 20 20 41 6e 64 20 | 49 20 44 4f 4e 27 54 20 |..  And |I DON'T |
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|000028b0| 6e 65 6d 61 20 42 6f 6e | 64 61 67 65 3f 20 20 49 |nema Bon|dage?  I|
|000028c0| 27 6d 20 63 61 6c 6c 69 | 6e 67 20 62 65 63 61 75 |'m calli|ng becau|
|000028d0| 73 65 20 49 20 77 61 6e | 74 20 74 6f 20 62 65 20 |se I wan|t to be |
|000028e0| 68 61 70 70 79 2c 20 49 | 20 67 75 65 73 73 2e 2e |happy, I| guess..|
|000028f0| 00 0a 48 65 72 65 20 49 | 20 61 6d 20 61 74 20 74 |..Here I| am at t|
|00002900| 68 65 20 66 6c 65 61 20 | 6d 61 72 6b 65 74 20 62 |he flea |market b|
|00002910| 75 74 20 6e 6f 62 6f 64 | 79 20 69 73 20 62 75 79 |ut nobod|y is buy|
|00002920| 69 6e 67 0a 20 6d 79 20 | 75 72 69 6e 65 20 73 61 |ing. my |urine sa|
|00002930| 6d 70 6c 65 20 62 6f 74 | 74 6c 65 73 2e 2e 00 0a |mple bot|tles....|
|00002940| 48 65 72 65 20 49 20 61 | 6d 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 |Here I a|m in the|
|00002950| 20 50 4f 53 54 45 52 49 | 4f 52 20 4f 4c 46 41 43 | POSTERI|OR OLFAC|
|00002960| 54 4f 52 59 20 4c 4f 42 | 55 4c 45 20 62 75 74 20 |TORY LOB|ULE but |
|00002970| 49 20 64 6f 6e 27 74 20 | 73 65 65 20 43 41 52 4c |I don't |see CARL|
|00002980| 20 53 41 47 41 4e 0a 20 | 61 6e 79 77 68 65 72 65 | SAGAN. |anywhere|
|00002990| 21 21 00 0a 48 65 72 65 | 20 77 65 20 61 72 65 20 |!!..Here| we are |
|000029a0| 69 6e 20 41 6d 65 72 69 | 63 61 2e 2e 2e 20 20 77 |in Ameri|ca...  w|
|000029b0| 68 65 6e 20 64 6f 20 77 | 65 20 63 6f 6c 6c 65 63 |hen do w|e collec|
|000029c0| 74 20 75 6e 65 6d 70 6c | 6f 79 6d 65 6e 74 3f 00 |t unempl|oyment?.|
|000029d0| 0a 48 65 79 2c 20 77 61 | 69 74 20 61 20 6d 69 6e |.Hey, wa|it a min|
|000029e0| 75 74 65 21 21 20 20 49 | 20 77 61 6e 74 20 61 20 |ute!!  I| want a |
|000029f0| 64 69 76 6f 72 63 65 21 | 21 2e 2e 20 20 79 6f 75 |divorce!|!..  you|
|00002a00| 27 72 65 20 6e 6f 74 20 | 43 6c 69 6e 74 20 45 61 |'re not |Clint Ea|
|00002a10| 73 74 77 6f 6f 64 21 21 | 00 0a 48 65 79 2c 20 77 |stwood!!|..Hey, w|
|00002a20| 61 69 74 65 72 21 20 20 | 49 20 77 61 6e 74 20 61 |aiter!  |I want a|
|00002a30| 20 4e 45 57 20 53 48 49 | 52 54 20 61 6e 64 20 61 | NEW SHI|RT and a|
|00002a40| 20 50 4f 4e 59 20 54 41 | 49 4c 20 77 69 74 68 20 | PONY TA|IL with |
|00002a50| 6c 65 6d 6f 6e 20 73 61 | 75 63 65 21 00 0a 48 69 |lemon sa|uce!..Hi|
|00002a60| 63 63 75 70 69 6e 67 20 | 26 20 74 72 65 6d 62 6c |ccuping |& trembl|
|00002a70| 69 6e 67 20 69 6e 74 6f | 20 74 68 65 20 57 41 53 |ing into| the WAS|
|00002a80| 54 45 20 44 55 4d 50 53 | 20 6f 66 20 4e 65 77 20 |TE DUMPS| of New |
|00002a90| 4a 65 72 73 65 79 20 6c | 69 6b 65 20 73 6f 6d 65 |Jersey l|ike some|
|00002aa0| 0a 20 64 72 75 6e 6b 65 | 6e 20 43 41 42 42 41 47 |. drunke|n CABBAG|
|00002ab0| 45 20 50 41 54 43 48 20 | 44 4f 4c 4c 2c 20 63 6f |E PATCH |DOLL, co|
|00002ac0| 75 67 68 69 6e 67 20 69 | 6e 20 6c 69 6e 65 20 61 |ughing i|n line a|
|00002ad0| 74 20 46 49 4f 52 55 43 | 43 49 27 53 21 21 00 0a |t FIORUC|CI'S!!..|
|00002ae0| 48 6d 6d 6d 2e 2e 20 20 | 41 20 68 61 73 68 2d 73 |Hmmm..  |A hash-s|
|00002af0| 69 6e 67 65 72 20 61 6e | 64 20 61 20 63 72 6f 73 |inger an|d a cros|
|00002b00| 73 2d 65 79 65 64 20 67 | 75 79 20 77 65 72 65 20 |s-eyed g|uy were |
|00002b10| 53 4c 45 45 50 49 4e 47 | 20 6f 6e 20 61 20 64 65 |SLEEPING| on a de|
|00002b20| 73 65 72 74 65 64 20 0a | 20 69 73 6c 61 6e 64 2c |serted .| island,|
|00002b30| 20 77 68 65 6e 2e 2e 2e | 00 0a 48 6d 6d 6d 2e 2e | when...|..Hmmm..|
|00002b40| 20 20 61 20 43 52 49 50 | 50 4c 45 44 20 41 43 43 |  a CRIP|PLED ACC|
|00002b50| 4f 55 4e 54 41 4e 54 20 | 77 69 74 68 20 61 20 46 |OUNTANT |with a F|
|00002b60| 41 4c 41 46 45 4c 20 73 | 61 6e 64 77 69 63 68 20 |ALAFEL s|andwich |
|00002b70| 69 73 20 48 49 54 0a 20 | 62 79 20 61 20 54 52 4f |is HIT. |by a TRO|
|00002b80| 4c 4c 45 59 2d 43 41 52 | 2e 2e 00 0a 48 6d 6d 6d |LLEY-CAR|....Hmmm|
|00002b90| 2e 2e 2e 20 20 61 20 50 | 49 4e 48 45 41 44 2c 20 |...  a P|INHEAD, |
|00002ba0| 64 75 72 69 6e 67 20 61 | 6e 20 45 41 52 54 48 51 |during a|n EARTHQ|
|00002bb0| 55 41 4b 45 2c 20 65 6e | 63 6f 75 6e 74 65 72 73 |UAKE, en|counters|
|00002bc0| 20 61 6e 20 41 4c 4c 2d | 4d 49 44 47 45 54 20 46 | an ALL-|MIDGET F|
|00002bd0| 49 44 44 4c 45 0a 20 4f | 52 43 48 45 53 54 52 41 |IDDLE. O|RCHESTRA|
|00002be0| 2e 2e 2e 20 20 68 61 2e | 2e 20 20 68 61 2e 2e 00 |...  ha.|.  ha...|
|00002bf0| 0a 48 6d 6d 6d 2e 2e 2e | 20 20 61 6e 20 61 72 72 |.Hmmm...|  an arr|
|00002c00| 6f 67 61 6e 74 20 62 6f | 75 71 75 65 74 20 77 69 |ogant bo|uquet wi|
|00002c10| 74 68 20 61 20 73 75 62 | 74 6c 65 20 73 75 67 67 |th a sub|tle sugg|
|00002c20| 65 73 74 69 6f 6e 20 6f | 66 0a 20 50 4f 4c 59 56 |estion o|f. POLYV|
|00002c30| 49 4e 59 4c 20 43 48 4c | 4f 52 49 44 45 2e 2e 2e |INYL CHL|ORIDE...|
|00002c40| 00 0a 48 6f 6c 64 20 74 | 68 65 20 4d 41 59 4f 20 |..Hold t|he MAYO |
|00002c50| 26 20 70 61 73 73 20 74 | 68 65 20 43 4f 53 4d 49 |& pass t|he COSMI|
|00002c60| 43 20 41 57 41 52 45 4e | 45 53 53 2e 2e 2e 00 0a |C AWAREN|ESS.....|
|00002c70| 48 6f 77 20 64 6f 20 49 | 20 67 65 74 20 48 4f 4d |How do I| get HOM|
|00002c80| 45 3f 00 0a 48 6f 77 20 | 64 6f 20 79 6f 75 20 65 |E?..How |do you e|
|00002c90| 78 70 6c 61 69 6e 20 57 | 61 79 6e 65 20 4e 65 77 |xplain W|ayne New|
|00002ca0| 74 6f 6e 27 73 20 50 4f | 57 45 52 20 6f 76 65 72 |ton's PO|WER over|
|00002cb0| 20 6d 69 6c 6c 69 6f 6e | 73 3f 0a 20 49 74 27 73 | million|s?. It's|
|00002cc0| 20 74 68 27 20 4d 4f 55 | 53 54 41 43 48 45 2e 2e | th' MOU|STACHE..|
|00002cd0| 2e 20 20 48 61 76 65 20 | 79 6f 75 20 65 76 65 72 |.  Have |you ever|
|00002ce0| 20 6e 6f 74 69 63 65 64 | 20 74 68 27 20 77 61 79 | noticed| th' way|
|00002cf0| 20 69 74 20 72 61 64 69 | 61 74 65 73 0a 20 53 49 | it radi|ates. SI|
|00002d00| 4e 43 45 52 49 54 59 2c | 20 48 4f 4e 45 53 54 59 |NCERITY,| HONESTY|
|00002d10| 20 26 20 57 41 52 4d 54 | 48 3f 20 20 49 74 27 73 | & WARMT|H?  It's|
|00002d20| 20 61 20 4d 4f 55 53 54 | 41 43 48 45 20 79 6f 75 | a MOUST|ACHE you|
|00002d30| 20 77 61 6e 74 20 74 6f | 20 74 61 6b 65 0a 20 48 | want to| take. H|
|00002d40| 4f 4d 45 20 61 6e 64 20 | 69 6e 74 72 6f 64 75 63 |OME and |introduc|
|00002d50| 65 20 74 6f 20 4e 41 4e | 43 59 20 53 49 4e 41 54 |e to NAN|CY SINAT|
|00002d60| 52 41 21 00 0a 48 6f 77 | 20 6d 61 6e 79 20 72 65 |RA!..How| many re|
|00002d70| 74 69 72 65 64 20 62 72 | 69 63 6b 6c 61 79 65 72 |tired br|icklayer|
|00002d80| 73 20 66 72 6f 6d 20 46 | 4c 4f 52 49 44 41 20 61 |s from F|LORIDA a|
|00002d90| 72 65 20 6f 75 74 20 70 | 75 72 63 68 61 73 69 6e |re out p|urchasin|
|00002da0| 67 0a 20 50 45 4e 43 49 | 4c 20 53 48 41 52 50 45 |g. PENCI|L SHARPE|
|00002db0| 4e 45 52 53 20 72 69 67 | 68 74 20 4e 4f 57 3f 3f |NERS rig|ht NOW??|
|00002dc0| 00 0a 48 6f 77 27 73 20 | 69 74 20 67 6f 69 6e 67 |..How's |it going|
|00002dd0| 20 69 6e 20 74 68 6f 73 | 65 20 4d 4f 44 55 4c 41 | in thos|e MODULA|
|00002de0| 52 20 4c 4f 56 45 20 55 | 4e 49 54 53 3f 3f 00 0a |R LOVE U|NITS??..|
|00002df0| 48 6f 77 27 73 20 74 68 | 65 20 77 69 66 65 3f 20 |How's th|e wife? |
|00002e00| 20 49 73 20 73 68 65 20 | 61 74 20 68 6f 6d 65 20 | Is she |at home |
|00002e10| 65 6e 6a 6f 79 69 6e 67 | 20 63 61 70 69 74 61 6c |enjoying| capital|
|00002e20| 69 73 6d 3f 00 0a 49 20 | 48 41 56 45 20 74 6f 20 |ism?..I |HAVE to |
|00002e30| 62 75 79 20 61 20 6e 65 | 77 20 60 60 44 4f 44 47 |buy a ne|w ``DODG|
|00002e40| 45 20 4d 49 53 45 52 27 | 27 20 61 6e 64 20 74 77 |E MISER'|' and tw|
|00002e50| 6f 20 64 6f 7a 65 6e 20 | 4a 4f 52 44 41 43 48 45 |o dozen |JORDACHE|
|00002e60| 0a 20 4a 45 41 4e 53 20 | 62 65 63 61 75 73 65 20 |. JEANS |because |
|00002e70| 6d 79 20 76 69 65 77 73 | 63 72 65 65 6e 20 69 73 |my views|creen is|
|00002e80| 20 60 60 55 53 45 52 2d | 46 52 49 45 4e 44 4c 59 | ``USER-|FRIENDLY|
|00002e90| 27 27 21 21 00 0a 49 20 | 4b 41 49 53 45 52 20 52 |''!!..I |KAISER R|
|00002ea0| 4f 4c 4c 3f 21 20 20 57 | 68 61 74 20 67 6f 6f 64 |OLL?!  W|hat good|
|00002eb0| 20 69 73 20 61 20 4b 61 | 69 73 65 72 20 52 6f 6c | is a Ka|iser Rol|
|00002ec0| 6c 20 77 69 74 68 6f 75 | 74 20 61 20 6c 69 74 74 |l withou|t a litt|
|00002ed0| 6c 65 0a 20 43 4f 4c 45 | 20 53 4c 41 57 20 6f 6e |le. COLE| SLAW on|
|00002ee0| 20 74 68 65 20 53 49 44 | 45 3f 00 0a 49 20 4b 6e | the SID|E?..I Kn|
|00002ef0| 6f 77 20 41 20 4a 6f 6b | 65 00 0a 49 20 61 6c 77 |ow A Jok|e..I alw|
|00002f00| 61 79 73 20 68 61 76 65 | 20 66 75 6e 20 62 65 63 |ays have| fun bec|
|00002f10| 61 75 73 65 20 49 27 6d | 20 6f 75 74 20 6f 66 20 |ause I'm| out of |
|00002f20| 6d 79 20 6d 69 6e 64 21 | 21 21 00 0a 49 20 61 6d |my mind!|!!..I am|
|00002f30| 20 4e 4f 54 20 61 20 6e | 75 74 2e 2e 2e 2e 00 0a | NOT a n|ut......|
|00002f40| 49 20 61 6d 20 61 20 6a | 65 6c 6c 79 20 64 6f 6e |I am a j|elly don|
|00002f50| 75 74 2e 20 20 49 20 61 | 6d 20 61 20 6a 65 6c 6c |ut.  I a|m a jell|
|00002f60| 79 20 64 6f 6e 75 74 2e | 00 0a 49 20 61 6d 20 61 |y donut.|..I am a|
|00002f70| 20 74 72 61 66 66 69 63 | 20 6c 69 67 68 74 2c 20 | traffic| light, |
|00002f80| 61 6e 64 20 41 6c 61 6e | 20 47 69 6e 7a 62 65 72 |and Alan| Ginzber|
|00002f90| 67 20 6b 69 64 6e 61 70 | 70 65 64 20 6d 79 20 6c |g kidnap|ped my l|
|00002fa0| 61 75 6e 64 72 79 20 69 | 6e 20 31 39 32 37 21 00 |aundry i|n 1927!.|
|00002fb0| 0a 49 20 61 6d 20 63 6f | 76 65 72 65 64 20 77 69 |.I am co|vered wi|
|00002fc0| 74 68 20 70 75 72 65 20 | 76 65 67 65 74 61 62 6c |th pure |vegetabl|
|00002fd0| 65 20 6f 69 6c 20 61 6e | 64 20 49 20 61 6d 20 77 |e oil an|d I am w|
|00002fe0| 72 69 74 69 6e 67 20 61 | 20 62 65 73 74 20 73 65 |riting a| best se|
|00002ff0| 6c 6c 65 72 21 00 0a 49 | 20 61 6d 20 64 65 65 70 |ller!..I| am deep|
|00003000| 6c 79 20 43 4f 4e 43 45 | 52 4e 45 44 20 61 6e 64 |ly CONCE|RNED and|
|00003010| 20 49 20 77 61 6e 74 20 | 73 6f 6d 65 74 68 69 6e | I want |somethin|
|00003020| 67 20 47 4f 4f 44 20 66 | 6f 72 20 42 52 45 41 4b |g GOOD f|or BREAK|
|00003030| 46 41 53 54 21 00 0a 49 | 20 61 6d 20 68 61 76 69 |FAST!..I| am havi|
|00003040| 6e 67 20 46 55 4e 2e 2e | 2e 20 20 49 20 77 6f 6e |ng FUN..|.  I won|
|00003050| 64 65 72 20 69 66 20 69 | 74 27 73 20 4e 45 54 20 |der if i|t's NET |
|00003060| 46 55 4e 20 6f 72 20 47 | 52 4f 53 53 20 46 55 4e |FUN or G|ROSS FUN|
|00003070| 3f 00 0a 49 20 61 70 70 | 6f 69 6e 74 20 79 6f 75 |?..I app|oint you|
|00003080| 20 61 6d 62 61 73 73 61 | 64 6f 72 20 74 6f 20 46 | ambassa|dor to F|
|00003090| 61 6e 74 61 73 79 20 49 | 73 6c 61 6e 64 21 21 21 |antasy I|sland!!!|
|000030a0| 00 0a 49 20 62 72 6f 75 | 67 68 74 20 6d 79 20 42 |..I brou|ght my B|
|000030b0| 4f 57 4c 49 4e 47 20 42 | 41 4c 4c 20 2d 20 61 6e |OWLING B|ALL - an|
|000030c0| 64 20 73 6f 6d 65 20 44 | 52 55 47 53 21 21 00 0a |d some D|RUGS!!..|
|000030d0| 49 20 63 61 6e 27 74 20 | 64 65 63 69 64 65 20 77 |I can't |decide w|
|000030e0| 68 69 63 68 20 57 52 4f | 4e 47 20 54 55 52 4e 20 |hich WRO|NG TURN |
|000030f0| 74 6f 20 6d 61 6b 65 20 | 66 69 72 73 74 21 21 0a |to make |first!!.|
|00003100| 20 49 20 77 6f 6e 64 65 | 72 20 69 66 20 42 4f 42 | I wonde|r if BOB|
|00003110| 20 47 55 43 43 49 4f 4e | 45 20 68 61 73 20 74 68 | GUCCION|E has th|
|00003120| 65 73 65 20 70 72 6f 62 | 6c 65 6d 73 21 00 0a 49 |ese prob|lems!..I|
|00003130| 20 63 61 6e 27 74 20 74 | 68 69 6e 6b 20 61 62 6f | can't t|hink abo|
|00003140| 75 74 20 74 68 61 74 2e | 20 20 49 74 20 64 6f 65 |ut that.|  It doe|
|00003150| 73 6e 27 74 20 67 6f 20 | 77 69 74 68 20 48 45 44 |sn't go |with HED|
|00003160| 47 45 53 20 69 6e 20 74 | 68 65 20 73 68 61 70 65 |GES in t|he shape|
|00003170| 20 6f 66 0a 20 4c 49 54 | 54 4c 45 20 4c 55 4c 55 | of. LIT|TLE LULU|
|00003180| 20 2d 2d 20 6f 72 20 52 | 4f 42 4f 54 53 20 6d 61 | -- or R|OBOTS ma|
|00003190| 6b 69 6e 67 20 42 52 49 | 43 4b 53 2e 2e 2e 00 0a |king BRI|CKS.....|
|000031a0| 49 20 64 65 6d 61 6e 64 | 20 49 4d 50 55 4e 49 54 |I demand| IMPUNIT|
|000031b0| 59 21 00 0a 49 20 64 69 | 64 6e 27 74 20 6f 72 64 |Y!..I di|dn't ord|
|000031c0| 65 72 20 61 6e 79 20 57 | 4f 4f 2d 57 4f 4f 2e 2e |er any W|OO-WOO..|
|000031d0| 2e 20 20 4d 61 79 62 65 | 20 61 20 59 55 42 42 41 |.  Maybe| a YUBBA|
|000031e0| 2e 2e 20 20 42 75 74 20 | 6e 6f 20 57 4f 4f 2d 57 |..  But |no WOO-W|
|000031f0| 4f 4f 21 00 0a 49 20 64 | 6f 6e 27 74 20 62 65 6c |OO!..I d|on't bel|
|00003200| 69 65 76 65 20 74 68 65 | 72 65 20 72 65 61 6c 6c |ieve the|re reall|
|00003210| 79 20 49 53 20 61 20 47 | 41 53 20 53 48 4f 52 54 |y IS a G|AS SHORT|
|00003220| 41 47 45 2e 2e 20 20 49 | 20 74 68 69 6e 6b 20 69 |AGE..  I| think i|
|00003230| 74 27 73 20 61 6c 6c 0a | 20 6a 75 73 74 20 61 20 |t's all.| just a |
|00003240| 42 49 47 20 48 4f 41 58 | 20 6f 6e 20 74 68 65 20 |BIG HOAX| on the |
|00003250| 70 61 72 74 20 6f 66 20 | 74 68 65 20 70 6c 61 73 |part of |the plas|
|00003260| 74 69 63 20 73 69 67 6e | 20 73 61 6c 65 73 6d 65 |tic sign| salesme|
|00003270| 6e 2d 2d 0a 20 2e 2e 20 | 20 74 6f 20 73 65 6c 6c |n--. .. | to sell|
|00003280| 20 6d 6f 72 65 20 6e 75 | 6d 62 65 72 73 21 21 00 | more nu|mbers!!.|
|00003290| 0a 49 20 64 6f 6e 27 74 | 20 6b 6e 6f 77 20 57 48 |.I don't| know WH|
|000032a0| 59 20 49 20 73 61 69 64 | 20 74 68 61 74 2e 2e 20 |Y I said| that.. |
|000032b0| 20 49 20 74 68 69 6e 6b | 20 69 74 20 63 61 6d 65 | I think| it came|
|000032c0| 20 66 72 6f 6d 20 74 68 | 65 20 46 49 4c 4c 49 4e | from th|e FILLIN|
|000032d0| 47 53 0a 20 69 6e 20 6d | 79 20 72 65 61 72 20 6d |GS. in m|y rear m|
|000032e0| 6f 6c 61 72 73 2e 2e 00 | 0a 49 20 66 65 65 6c 20 |olars...|.I feel |
|000032f0| 62 65 74 74 65 72 20 61 | 62 6f 75 74 20 77 6f 72 |better a|bout wor|
|00003300| 6c 64 20 70 72 6f 62 6c | 65 6d 73 20 6e 6f 77 21 |ld probl|ems now!|
|00003310| 00 0a 49 20 66 65 65 6c | 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 49 20 |..I feel| like I |
|00003320| 61 6d 20 73 68 61 72 69 | 6e 67 20 61 20 60 60 43 |am shari|ng a ``C|
|00003330| 4f 52 4e 2d 44 4f 47 27 | 27 20 77 69 74 68 20 4e |ORN-DOG'|' with N|
|00003340| 49 4b 49 54 41 20 4b 48 | 52 55 53 43 48 45 56 2e |IKITA KH|RUSCHEV.|
|00003350| 2e 00 0a 49 20 66 65 65 | 6c 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 49 |...I fee|l like I|
|00003360| 27 6d 20 69 6e 20 61 20 | 54 6f 69 6c 65 74 20 42 |'m in a |Toilet B|
|00003370| 6f 77 6c 20 77 69 74 68 | 20 61 20 74 68 75 6d 62 |owl with| a thumb|
|00003380| 74 61 63 6b 20 69 6e 20 | 6d 79 20 66 6f 72 65 68 |tack in |my foreh|
|00003390| 65 61 64 21 21 00 0a 49 | 20 66 65 65 6c 20 6c 69 |ead!!..I| feel li|
|000033a0| 6b 65 20 61 20 77 65 74 | 20 70 61 72 6b 69 6e 67 |ke a wet| parking|
|000033b0| 20 6d 65 74 65 72 20 6f | 6e 20 44 61 72 76 6f 6e | meter o|n Darvon|
|000033c0| 21 00 0a 49 20 66 65 65 | 6c 20 70 61 72 74 69 61 |!..I fee|l partia|
|000033d0| 6c 6c 79 20 68 79 64 72 | 6f 67 65 6e 61 74 65 64 |lly hydr|ogenated|
|000033e0| 21 00 0a 49 20 66 69 6c | 6c 20 4d 59 20 69 6e 64 |!..I fil|l MY ind|
|000033f0| 75 73 74 72 69 61 6c 20 | 77 61 73 74 65 20 63 6f |ustrial |waste co|
|00003400| 6e 74 61 69 6e 65 72 73 | 20 77 69 74 68 20 6f 6c |ntainers| with ol|
|00003410| 64 20 63 6f 70 69 65 73 | 0a 20 6f 66 20 74 68 65 |d copies|. of the|
|00003420| 20 60 60 57 41 54 43 48 | 54 4f 57 45 52 27 27 20 | ``WATCH|TOWER'' |
|00003430| 61 6e 64 20 74 68 65 6e | 20 61 64 64 20 48 41 57 |and then| add HAW|
|00003440| 41 49 49 41 4e 20 50 55 | 4e 43 48 20 74 6f 0a 20 |AIIAN PU|NCH to. |
|00003450| 74 68 65 20 74 6f 70 2e | 2e 20 20 54 68 65 79 20 |the top.|.  They |
|00003460| 6c 6f 6f 6b 20 4e 49 43 | 45 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 |look NIC|E in the|
|00003470| 20 79 61 72 64 2d 2d 00 | 0a 49 20 67 75 65 73 73 | yard--.|.I guess|
|00003480| 20 69 74 20 77 61 73 20 | 61 6c 6c 20 61 20 44 52 | it was |all a DR|
|00003490| 45 41 4d 2e 2e 20 20 6f | 72 20 61 6e 20 65 70 69 |EAM..  o|r an epi|
|000034a0| 73 6f 64 65 20 6f 66 20 | 48 41 57 41 49 49 20 46 |sode of |HAWAII F|
|000034b0| 49 56 45 2d 4f 2e 2e 2e | 00 0a 49 20 67 75 65 73 |IVE-O...|..I gues|
|000034c0| 73 20 79 6f 75 20 67 75 | 79 73 20 67 6f 74 20 42 |s you gu|ys got B|
|000034d0| 49 47 20 4d 55 53 43 4c | 45 53 20 66 72 6f 6d 20 |IG MUSCL|ES from |
|000034e0| 64 6f 69 6e 67 20 74 6f | 6f 20 6d 75 63 68 20 53 |doing to|o much S|
|000034f0| 54 55 44 59 49 4e 47 21 | 00 0a 49 20 68 61 64 20 |TUDYING!|..I had |
|00003500| 61 20 6c 65 61 73 65 20 | 6f 6e 20 61 6e 20 4f 45 |a lease |on an OE|
|00003510| 44 49 50 55 53 20 43 4f | 4d 50 4c 45 58 20 62 61 |DIPUS CO|MPLEX ba|
|00003520| 63 6b 20 69 6e 20 27 38 | 31 2e 2e 2e 00 0a 49 20 |ck in '8|1.....I |
|00003530| 68 61 64 20 70 61 6e 63 | 61 6b 65 20 6d 61 6b 65 |had panc|ake make|
|00003540| 75 70 20 66 6f 72 20 62 | 72 75 6e 63 68 21 00 0a |up for b|runch!..|
|00003550| 49 20 68 61 76 65 20 61 | 20 54 49 4e 59 20 42 4f |I have a| TINY BO|
|00003560| 57 4c 20 69 6e 20 6d 79 | 20 48 45 41 44 00 0a 49 |WL in my| HEAD..I|
|00003570| 20 68 61 76 65 20 61 20 | 76 65 72 79 20 67 6f 6f | have a |very goo|
|00003580| 64 20 44 45 4e 54 41 4c | 20 50 4c 41 4e 2e 20 20 |d DENTAL| PLAN.  |
|00003590| 54 68 61 6e 6b 20 79 6f | 75 2e 00 0a 49 20 68 61 |Thank yo|u...I ha|
|000035a0| 76 65 20 61 63 63 65 70 | 74 65 64 20 50 72 6f 76 |ve accep|ted Prov|
|000035b0| 6f 6c 6f 6e 65 20 69 6e | 74 6f 20 6d 79 20 6c 69 |olone in|to my li|
|000035c0| 66 65 21 00 0a 49 20 68 | 61 76 65 20 6d 61 6e 79 |fe!..I h|ave many|
|000035d0| 20 43 48 41 52 54 53 20 | 61 6e 64 20 44 49 41 47 | CHARTS |and DIAG|
|000035e0| 52 41 4d 53 2e 2e 00 0a | 49 20 68 61 76 65 20 73 |RAMS....|I have s|
|000035f0| 65 65 6e 20 74 68 65 73 | 65 20 45 47 47 20 45 58 |een thes|e EGG EX|
|00003600| 54 45 4e 44 45 52 53 20 | 69 6e 20 6d 79 20 53 75 |TENDERS |in my Su|
|00003610| 70 65 72 6d 61 72 6b 65 | 74 2e 2e 0a 20 2e 2e 20 |permarke|t... .. |
|00003620| 20 49 20 68 61 76 65 20 | 72 65 61 64 20 74 68 65 | I have |read the|
|00003630| 20 49 4e 53 54 52 55 43 | 54 49 4f 4e 53 2e 2e 2e | INSTRUC|TIONS...|
|00003640| 00 0a 49 20 68 61 76 65 | 20 74 68 65 20 70 6f 77 |..I have| the pow|
|00003650| 65 72 20 74 6f 20 48 41 | 4c 54 20 50 52 4f 44 55 |er to HA|LT PRODU|
|00003660| 43 54 49 4f 4e 20 6f 6e | 20 61 6c 6c 20 54 45 45 |CTION on| all TEE|
|00003670| 4e 41 47 45 20 53 45 58 | 20 43 4f 4d 45 44 49 45 |NAGE SEX| COMEDIE|
|00003680| 53 21 21 00 0a 49 20 68 | 61 76 65 6e 27 74 20 62 |S!!..I h|aven't b|
|00003690| 65 65 6e 20 6d 61 72 72 | 69 65 64 20 69 6e 20 6f |een marr|ied in o|
|000036a0| 76 65 72 20 73 69 78 20 | 79 65 61 72 73 2c 20 62 |ver six |years, b|
|000036b0| 75 74 20 77 65 20 68 61 | 64 20 73 65 78 75 61 6c |ut we ha|d sexual|
|000036c0| 20 63 6f 75 6e 73 65 6c | 69 6e 67 0a 20 65 76 65 | counsel|ing. eve|
|000036d0| 72 79 20 64 61 79 20 66 | 72 6f 6d 20 4f 72 61 6c |ry day f|rom Oral|
|000036e0| 20 52 6f 62 65 72 74 73 | 21 21 00 0a 49 20 68 6f | Roberts|!!..I ho|
|000036f0| 70 65 20 49 20 62 6f 75 | 67 68 74 20 74 68 65 20 |pe I bou|ght the |
|00003700| 72 69 67 68 74 20 72 65 | 6c 69 73 68 2e 2e 2e 20 |right re|lish... |
|00003710| 20 7a 7a 7a 7a 7a 7a 7a | 7a 7a 2e 2e 2e 00 0a 49 | zzzzzzz|zz.....I|
|00003720| 20 68 6f 70 65 20 73 6f | 6d 65 74 68 69 6e 67 20 | hope so|mething |
|00003730| 47 4f 4f 44 20 63 61 6d | 65 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 |GOOD cam|e in the|
|00003740| 20 6d 61 69 6c 20 74 6f | 64 61 79 20 73 6f 20 49 | mail to|day so I|
|00003750| 20 68 61 76 65 0a 20 61 | 20 52 45 41 53 4f 4e 20 | have. a| REASON |
|00003760| 74 6f 20 6c 69 76 65 21 | 21 00 0a 49 20 68 6f 70 |to live!|!..I hop|
|00003770| 65 20 74 68 65 20 60 60 | 45 75 72 79 74 68 6d 69 |e the ``|Eurythmi|
|00003780| 63 73 27 27 20 70 72 61 | 63 74 69 63 65 20 62 69 |cs'' pra|ctice bi|
|00003790| 72 74 68 20 63 6f 6e 74 | 72 6f 6c 2e 2e 2e 00 0a |rth cont|rol.....|
|000037a0| 49 20 68 6f 70 65 20 79 | 6f 75 20 6d 69 6c 6c 69 |I hope y|ou milli|
|000037b0| 6f 6e 61 69 72 65 73 20 | 61 72 65 20 68 61 76 69 |onaires |are havi|
|000037c0| 6e 67 20 66 75 6e 21 20 | 20 49 20 6a 75 73 74 20 |ng fun! | I just |
|000037d0| 69 6e 76 65 73 74 65 64 | 20 68 61 6c 66 0a 20 79 |invested| half. y|
|000037e0| 6f 75 72 20 6c 69 66 65 | 20 73 61 76 69 6e 67 73 |our life| savings|
|000037f0| 20 69 6e 20 79 65 61 73 | 74 21 21 00 0a 49 20 69 | in yeas|t!!..I i|
|00003800| 6e 76 65 6e 74 65 64 20 | 73 6b 79 64 69 76 69 6e |nvented |skydivin|
|00003810| 67 20 69 6e 20 31 39 38 | 39 21 00 0a 49 20 6a 6f |g in 198|9!..I jo|
|00003820| 69 6e 65 64 20 73 63 69 | 65 6e 74 6f 6c 6f 67 79 |ined sci|entology|
|00003830| 20 61 74 20 61 20 67 61 | 72 61 67 65 20 73 61 6c | at a ga|rage sal|
|00003840| 65 21 21 00 0a 49 20 6a | 75 73 74 20 66 6f 72 67 |e!!..I j|ust forg|
|00003850| 6f 74 20 6d 79 20 77 68 | 6f 6c 65 20 70 68 69 6c |ot my wh|ole phil|
|00003860| 6f 73 6f 70 68 79 20 6f | 66 20 6c 69 66 65 21 21 |osophy o|f life!!|
|00003870| 21 00 0a 49 20 6a 75 73 | 74 20 67 6f 74 20 6d 79 |!..I jus|t got my|
|00003880| 20 50 52 49 4e 43 45 20 | 62 75 6d 70 65 72 20 73 | PRINCE |bumper s|
|00003890| 74 69 63 6b 65 72 2e 2e | 0a 20 42 75 74 20 6e 6f |ticker..|. But no|
|000038a0| 77 20 49 20 63 61 6e 27 | 74 20 72 65 6d 65 6d 62 |w I can'|t rememb|
|000038b0| 65 72 20 57 48 4f 20 68 | 65 20 69 73 2e 2e 2e 00 |er WHO h|e is....|
|000038c0| 0a 49 20 6a 75 73 74 20 | 68 61 64 20 61 20 4e 4f |.I just |had a NO|
|000038d0| 53 45 20 4a 4f 42 21 21 | 00 0a 49 20 6a 75 73 74 |SE JOB!!|..I just|
|000038e0| 20 68 61 64 20 6d 79 20 | 65 6e 74 69 72 65 20 49 | had my |entire I|
|000038f0| 4e 54 45 53 54 49 4e 41 | 4c 20 54 52 41 43 54 20 |NTESTINA|L TRACT |
|00003900| 63 6f 61 74 65 64 20 77 | 69 74 68 20 54 45 46 4c |coated w|ith TEFL|
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|00003920| 64 20 74 68 65 20 53 45 | 56 45 4e 54 49 45 53 20 |d the SE|VENTIES |
|00003930| 77 65 72 65 20 6f 76 65 | 72 21 21 20 20 41 6e 64 |were ove|r!!  And|
|00003940| 20 49 20 77 61 73 20 6a | 75 73 74 20 67 65 74 74 | I was j|ust gett|
|00003950| 69 6e 67 20 69 6e 20 74 | 6f 75 63 68 0a 20 77 69 |ing in t|ouch. wi|
|00003960| 74 68 20 6d 79 20 4c 45 | 49 53 55 52 45 20 53 55 |th my LE|ISURE SU|
|00003970| 49 54 21 21 00 0a 49 20 | 6a 75 73 74 20 72 65 6d |IT!!..I |just rem|
|00003980| 65 6d 62 65 72 65 64 20 | 73 6f 6d 65 74 68 69 6e |embered |somethin|
|00003990| 67 20 61 62 6f 75 74 20 | 61 20 54 4f 41 44 21 00 |g about |a TOAD!.|
|000039a0| 0a 49 20 6b 6e 6f 77 20 | 68 6f 77 20 74 6f 20 64 |.I know |how to d|
|000039b0| 6f 20 53 50 45 43 49 41 | 4c 20 45 46 46 45 43 54 |o SPECIA|L EFFECT|
|000039c0| 53 21 21 00 0a 49 20 6b | 6e 6f 77 20 74 68 27 4d |S!!..I k|now th'M|
|000039d0| 41 4d 42 4f 21 21 20 20 | 49 20 68 61 76 65 20 61 |AMBO!!  |I have a|
|000039e0| 20 54 57 4f 2d 54 4f 4e | 45 20 43 48 45 4d 49 53 | TWO-TON|E CHEMIS|
|000039f0| 54 52 59 20 53 45 54 21 | 21 00 0a 49 20 6b 6e 6f |TRY SET!|!..I kno|
|00003a00| 77 20 74 68 69 6e 67 73 | 20 61 62 6f 75 74 20 54 |w things| about T|
|00003a10| 52 4f 59 20 44 4f 4e 41 | 48 55 45 20 74 68 61 74 |ROY DONA|HUE that|
|00003a20| 20 63 61 6e 27 74 20 65 | 76 65 6e 20 62 65 20 50 | can't e|ven be P|
|00003a30| 52 49 4e 54 45 44 21 21 | 00 0a 49 20 6c 65 66 74 |RINTED!!|..I left|
|00003a40| 20 6d 79 20 57 41 4c 4c | 45 54 20 69 6e 20 74 68 | my WALL|ET in th|
|00003a50| 65 20 42 41 54 48 52 4f | 4f 4d 21 21 00 0a 49 20 |e BATHRO|OM!!..I |
|00003a60| 6c 69 6b 65 20 74 68 65 | 20 77 61 79 20 4f 4e 4c |like the| way ONL|
|00003a70| 59 20 74 68 65 69 72 20 | 6d 6f 75 74 68 73 20 6d |Y their |mouths m|
|00003a80| 6f 76 65 2e 2e 20 20 54 | 68 65 79 20 6c 6f 6f 6b |ove..  T|hey look|
|00003a90| 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 44 59 | 49 4e 47 20 4f 59 53 54 | like DY|ING OYST|
|00003aa0| 45 52 53 00 0a 49 20 6c | 69 6b 65 20 79 6f 75 72 |ERS..I l|ike your|
|00003ab0| 20 53 4e 4f 4f 50 59 20 | 50 4f 53 54 45 52 21 21 | SNOOPY |POSTER!!|
|00003ac0| 00 0a 49 20 6c 6f 76 65 | 20 52 4f 43 4b 20 27 4e |..I love| ROCK 'N|
|00003ad0| 20 52 4f 4c 4c 21 20 20 | 49 20 6d 65 6d 6f 72 69 | ROLL!  |I memori|
|00003ae0| 7a 65 64 20 74 68 65 20 | 61 6c 6c 20 57 4f 52 44 |zed the |all WORD|
|00003af0| 53 20 74 6f 20 60 60 57 | 49 50 45 2d 4f 55 54 27 |S to ``W|IPE-OUT'|
|00003b00| 27 20 69 6e 20 31 39 36 | 35 21 21 00 0a 49 20 6e |' in 196|5!!..I n|
|00003b10| 65 65 64 20 74 6f 20 64 | 69 73 63 75 73 73 20 42 |eed to d|iscuss B|
|00003b20| 55 59 2d 42 41 43 4b 20 | 50 52 4f 56 49 53 49 4f |UY-BACK |PROVISIO|
|00003b30| 4e 53 20 77 69 74 68 20 | 61 74 20 6c 65 61 73 74 |NS with |at least|
|00003b40| 0a 20 73 69 78 20 73 74 | 75 64 69 6f 20 53 4c 45 |. six st|udio SLE|
|00003b50| 41 5a 45 42 41 4c 4c 53 | 21 21 00 0a 49 20 6f 6e |AZEBALLS|!!..I on|
|00003b60| 63 65 20 64 65 63 6f 72 | 61 74 65 64 20 6d 79 20 |ce decor|ated my |
|00003b70| 61 70 61 72 74 6d 65 6e | 74 20 65 6e 74 69 72 65 |apartmen|t entire|
|00003b80| 6c 79 20 69 6e 20 74 65 | 6e 20 66 6f 6f 74 20 73 |ly in te|n foot s|
|00003b90| 61 6c 61 64 20 66 6f 72 | 6b 73 21 21 00 0a 49 20 |alad for|ks!!..I |
|00003ba0| 6f 77 6e 20 73 65 76 65 | 6e 2d 65 69 67 68 74 68 |own seve|n-eighth|
|00003bb0| 73 20 6f 66 20 61 6c 6c | 20 74 68 65 20 61 72 74 |s of all| the art|
|00003bc0| 69 73 74 73 20 69 6e 20 | 64 6f 77 6e 74 6f 77 6e |ists in |downtown|
|00003bd0| 20 42 75 72 62 61 6e 6b | 21 00 0a 49 20 70 75 74 | Burbank|!..I put|
|00003be0| 20 61 73 69 64 65 20 6d | 79 20 63 6f 70 79 20 6f | aside m|y copy o|
|00003bf0| 66 20 60 60 42 4f 57 4c | 49 4e 47 20 57 4f 52 4c |f ``BOWL|ING WORL|
|00003c00| 44 27 27 20 61 6e 64 20 | 74 68 69 6e 6b 0a 20 61 |D'' and |think. a|
|00003c10| 62 6f 75 74 20 47 55 4e | 20 43 4f 4e 54 52 4f 4c |bout GUN| CONTROL|
|00003c20| 20 6c 65 67 69 73 6c 61 | 74 69 6f 6e 2e 2e 00 0a | legisla|tion....|
|00003c30| 49 20 72 65 70 72 65 73 | 65 6e 74 20 61 20 73 61 |I repres|ent a sa|
|00003c40| 72 64 69 6e 65 21 21 00 | 0a 49 20 72 65 71 75 65 |rdine!!.|.I reque|
|00003c50| 73 74 20 61 20 77 65 65 | 6b 65 6e 64 20 69 6e 20 |st a wee|kend in |
|00003c60| 48 61 76 61 6e 61 20 77 | 69 74 68 20 50 68 69 6c |Havana w|ith Phil|
|00003c70| 20 53 69 6c 76 65 72 73 | 21 00 0a 49 20 73 65 6c | Silvers|!..I sel|
|00003c80| 65 63 74 65 64 20 45 35 | 2e 2e 2e 20 20 62 75 74 |ected E5|...  but|
|00003c90| 20 49 20 64 69 64 6e 27 | 74 20 68 65 61 72 20 60 | I didn'|t hear `|
|00003ca0| 60 53 61 6d 20 74 68 65 | 20 53 68 61 6d 20 61 6e |`Sam the| Sham an|
|00003cb0| 64 20 74 68 65 20 50 68 | 61 72 61 6f 68 73 27 27 |d the Ph|araohs''|
|00003cc0| 21 00 0a 49 20 73 6d 65 | 6c 6c 20 61 20 52 41 4e |!..I sme|ll a RAN|
|00003cd0| 43 49 44 20 43 4f 52 4e | 20 44 4f 47 21 00 0a 49 |CID CORN| DOG!..I|
|00003ce0| 20 73 6d 65 6c 6c 20 6c | 69 6b 65 20 61 20 77 65 | smell l|ike a we|
|00003cf0| 74 20 72 65 64 75 63 69 | 6e 67 20 63 6c 69 6e 69 |t reduci|ng clini|
|00003d00| 63 20 6f 6e 20 43 6f 6c | 75 6d 62 75 73 20 44 61 |c on Col|umbus Da|
|00003d10| 79 21 00 0a 49 20 74 68 | 69 6e 6b 20 49 20 61 6d |y!..I th|ink I am|
|00003d20| 20 61 6e 20 6f 76 65 72 | 6e 69 67 68 74 20 73 65 | an over|night se|
|00003d30| 6e 73 61 74 69 6f 6e 20 | 72 69 67 68 74 20 6e 6f |nsation |right no|
|00003d40| 77 21 21 00 0a 49 20 74 | 68 69 6e 6b 20 6d 79 20 |w!!..I t|hink my |
|00003d50| 63 61 72 65 65 72 20 69 | 73 20 72 75 69 6e 65 64 |career i|s ruined|
|00003d60| 21 00 0a 49 20 75 73 65 | 64 20 74 6f 20 62 65 20 |!..I use|d to be |
|00003d70| 61 20 46 55 4e 44 41 4d | 45 4e 54 41 4c 49 53 54 |a FUNDAM|ENTALIST|
|00003d80| 2c 20 62 75 74 20 74 68 | 65 6e 20 49 20 68 65 61 |, but th|en I hea|
|00003d90| 72 64 20 61 62 6f 75 74 | 20 74 68 65 0a 20 48 49 |rd about| the. HI|
|00003da0| 47 48 20 52 41 44 49 41 | 54 49 4f 4e 20 4c 45 56 |GH RADIA|TION LEV|
|00003db0| 45 4c 53 20 61 6e 64 20 | 62 6f 75 67 68 74 20 61 |ELS and |bought a|
|00003dc0| 6e 20 45 4e 43 59 43 4c | 4f 50 45 44 49 41 21 21 |n ENCYCL|OPEDIA!!|
|00003dd0| 00 0a 49 20 77 61 6e 74 | 20 45 41 52 53 21 20 20 |..I want| EARS!  |
|00003de0| 49 20 77 61 6e 74 20 74 | 77 6f 20 52 4f 55 4e 44 |I want t|wo ROUND|
|00003df0| 20 42 4c 41 43 4b 20 45 | 41 52 53 20 74 6f 20 6d | BLACK E|ARS to m|
|00003e00| 61 6b 65 20 6d 65 20 66 | 65 65 6c 20 77 61 72 6d |ake me f|eel warm|
|00003e10| 20 27 6e 20 73 65 63 75 | 72 65 21 21 00 0a 49 20 | 'n secu|re!!..I |
|00003e20| 77 61 6e 74 20 61 20 56 | 45 47 45 54 41 52 49 41 |want a V|EGETARIA|
|00003e30| 4e 20 42 55 52 52 49 54 | 4f 20 74 6f 20 67 6f 2e |N BURRIT|O to go.|
|00003e40| 2e 20 20 77 69 74 68 20 | 45 58 54 52 41 20 4d 53 |.  with |EXTRA MS|
|00003e50| 47 21 21 00 0a 49 20 77 | 61 6e 74 20 61 20 57 45 |G!!..I w|ant a WE|
|00003e60| 53 53 4f 4e 20 4f 49 4c | 20 6c 65 61 73 65 21 21 |SSON OIL| lease!!|
|00003e70| 00 0a 49 20 77 61 6e 74 | 20 61 6e 6f 74 68 65 72 |..I want| another|
|00003e80| 20 52 45 2d 57 52 49 54 | 45 20 6f 6e 20 6d 79 20 | RE-WRIT|E on my |
|00003e90| 43 41 45 53 41 52 20 53 | 41 4c 41 44 21 21 00 0a |CAESAR S|ALAD!!..|
|00003ea0| 49 20 77 61 6e 74 20 74 | 68 65 20 70 72 65 73 69 |I want t|he presi|
|00003eb0| 64 65 6e 63 79 20 73 6f | 20 62 61 64 20 49 20 63 |dency so| bad I c|
|00003ec0| 61 6e 20 61 6c 72 65 61 | 64 79 20 74 61 73 74 65 |an alrea|dy taste|
|00003ed0| 20 74 68 65 20 68 6f 72 | 73 20 64 27 6f 65 75 76 | the hor|s d'oeuv|
|00003ee0| 72 65 73 2e 00 0a 49 20 | 77 61 6e 74 20 74 6f 20 |res...I |want to |
|00003ef0| 64 72 65 73 73 20 79 6f | 75 20 75 70 20 61 73 20 |dress yo|u up as |
|00003f00| 54 41 4c 4c 55 4c 41 48 | 20 42 41 4e 4b 48 45 41 |TALLULAH| BANKHEA|
|00003f10| 44 20 61 6e 64 20 63 6f | 76 65 72 20 79 6f 75 20 |D and co|ver you |
|00003f20| 77 69 74 68 0a 20 56 41 | 53 45 4c 49 4e 45 20 61 |with. VA|SELINE a|
|00003f30| 6e 64 20 57 48 45 41 54 | 20 54 48 49 4e 53 2e 2e |nd WHEAT| THINS..|
|00003f40| 00 0a 49 20 77 61 6e 74 | 20 74 6f 20 6b 69 6c 6c |..I want| to kill|
|00003f50| 20 65 76 65 72 79 6f 6e | 65 20 68 65 72 65 20 77 | everyon|e here w|
|00003f60| 69 74 68 20 61 20 63 75 | 74 65 20 63 6f 6c 6f 72 |ith a cu|te color|
|00003f70| 66 75 6c 20 48 79 64 72 | 6f 67 65 6e 20 42 6f 6d |ful Hydr|ogen Bom|
|00003f80| 62 21 21 00 0a 49 20 77 | 61 6e 74 20 74 6f 20 72 |b!!..I w|ant to r|
|00003f90| 65 61 64 20 6d 79 20 6e | 65 77 20 70 6f 65 6d 20 |ead my n|ew poem |
|00003fa0| 61 62 6f 75 74 20 70 6f | 72 6b 20 62 72 61 69 6e |about po|rk brain|
|00003fb0| 73 20 61 6e 64 20 6f 75 | 74 65 72 20 73 70 61 63 |s and ou|ter spac|
|00003fc0| 65 2e 2e 2e 00 0a 49 20 | 77 61 6e 74 20 74 6f 20 |e.....I |want to |
|00003fd0| 73 6f 20 48 41 50 50 59 | 2c 20 74 68 65 20 56 45 |so HAPPY|, the VE|
|00003fe0| 49 4e 53 20 69 6e 20 6d | 79 20 6e 65 63 6b 20 53 |INS in m|y neck S|
|00003ff0| 54 41 4e 44 20 4f 55 54 | 21 21 00 0a 49 20 77 61 |TAND OUT|!!..I wa|
|00004000| 6e 74 20 79 6f 75 20 74 | 6f 20 4d 45 4d 4f 52 49 |nt you t|o MEMORI|
|00004010| 5a 45 20 74 68 65 20 63 | 6f 6c 6c 65 63 74 65 64 |ZE the c|ollected|
|00004020| 20 70 6f 65 6d 73 20 6f | 66 20 45 44 4e 41 20 53 | poems o|f EDNA S|
|00004030| 54 20 56 49 4e 43 45 4e | 54 20 4d 49 4c 4c 41 59 |T VINCEN|T MILLAY|
|00004040| 2e 2e 0a 20 42 41 43 4b | 57 41 52 44 53 21 21 00 |... BACK|WARDS!!.|
|00004050| 0a 49 20 77 61 6e 74 20 | 79 6f 75 20 74 6f 20 6f |.I want |you to o|
|00004060| 72 67 61 6e 69 7a 65 20 | 6d 79 20 50 41 53 54 52 |rganize |my PASTR|
|00004070| 59 20 74 72 61 79 73 2e | 2e 2e 20 20 6d 79 20 54 |Y trays.|..  my T|
|00004080| 45 41 2d 54 49 4e 53 20 | 61 72 65 20 67 6c 65 61 |EA-TINS |are glea|
|00004090| 6d 69 6e 67 20 69 6e 0a | 20 66 6f 72 6d 61 74 69 |ming in.| formati|
|000040a0| 6f 6e 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 | 61 20 52 4f 57 20 6f 66 |on like |a ROW of|
|000040b0| 20 44 52 55 4d 20 4d 41 | 4a 4f 52 45 54 54 45 53 | DRUM MA|JORETTES|
|000040c0| 20 2d 2d 0a 20 70 6c 65 | 61 73 65 20 64 6f 6e 27 | --. ple|ase don'|
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|000040e0| 68 20 6d 65 20 2d 2d 00 | 0a 49 20 77 61 73 20 62 |h me --.|.I was b|
|000040f0| 6f 72 6e 20 69 6e 20 61 | 20 48 6f 73 74 65 73 73 |orn in a| Hostess|
|00004100| 20 43 75 70 63 61 6b 65 | 20 66 61 63 74 6f 72 79 | Cupcake| factory|
|00004110| 20 62 65 66 6f 72 65 20 | 74 68 65 20 73 65 78 75 | before |the sexu|
|00004120| 61 6c 20 72 65 76 6f 6c | 75 74 69 6f 6e 21 00 0a |al revol|ution!..|
|00004130| 49 20 77 61 73 20 6d 61 | 6b 69 6e 67 20 64 6f 6e |I was ma|king don|
|00004140| 75 74 73 20 61 6e 64 20 | 6e 6f 77 20 49 27 6d 20 |uts and |now I'm |
|00004150| 6f 6e 20 61 20 62 75 73 | 21 00 0a 49 20 77 69 73 |on a bus|!..I wis|
|00004160| 68 20 49 20 77 61 73 20 | 61 20 73 65 78 2d 73 74 |h I was |a sex-st|
|00004170| 61 72 76 65 64 20 6d 61 | 6e 69 63 75 72 69 73 74 |arved ma|nicurist|
|00004180| 20 66 6f 75 6e 64 20 64 | 65 61 64 20 69 6e 20 74 | found d|ead in t|
|00004190| 68 65 20 42 72 6f 6e 78 | 21 21 00 0a 49 20 77 69 |he Bronx|!!..I wi|
|000041a0| 73 68 20 49 20 77 61 73 | 20 6f 6e 20 61 20 43 69 |sh I was| on a Ci|
|000041b0| 6e 63 69 6e 6e 61 74 69 | 20 73 74 72 65 65 74 20 |ncinnati| street |
|000041c0| 63 6f 72 6e 65 72 20 68 | 6f 6c 64 69 6e 67 20 61 |corner h|olding a|
|000041d0| 20 63 6c 65 61 6e 20 64 | 6f 67 21 00 0a 49 20 77 | clean d|og!..I w|
|000041e0| 6f 6e 64 65 72 20 69 66 | 20 49 20 63 6f 75 6c 64 |onder if| I could|
|000041f0| 20 65 76 65 72 20 67 65 | 74 20 73 74 61 72 74 65 | ever ge|t starte|
|00004200| 64 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 | 20 63 72 65 64 69 74 20 |d in the| credit |
|00004210| 77 6f 72 6c 64 3f 00 0a | 49 20 77 6f 6e 64 65 72 |world?..|I wonder|
|00004220| 20 69 66 20 49 20 73 68 | 6f 75 6c 64 20 70 75 74 | if I sh|ould put|
|00004230| 20 6d 79 73 65 6c 66 20 | 69 6e 20 45 53 43 52 4f | myself |in ESCRO|
|00004240| 57 21 21 00 0a 49 20 77 | 6f 6e 64 65 72 20 69 66 |W!!..I w|onder if|
|00004250| 20 74 68 65 72 65 27 73 | 20 61 6e 79 74 68 69 6e | there's| anythin|
|00004260| 67 20 47 4f 4f 44 20 6f | 6e 20 74 6f 6e 69 67 68 |g GOOD o|n tonigh|
|00004270| 74 3f 00 0a 49 20 77 6f | 75 6c 64 20 6c 69 6b 65 |t?..I wo|uld like|
|00004280| 20 74 6f 20 75 72 69 6e | 61 74 65 20 69 6e 20 61 | to urin|ate in a|
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|000042a0| 61 69 6e 20 70 6f 6f 6c | 20 2d 2d 00 0a 49 27 64 |ain pool| --..I'd|
|000042b0| 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 4d 59 | 20 64 61 74 61 2d 62 61 | like MY| data-ba|
|000042c0| 73 65 20 4a 55 4c 49 45 | 4e 4e 45 44 20 61 6e 64 |se JULIE|NNED and|
|000042d0| 20 73 74 69 72 2d 66 72 | 69 65 64 21 00 0a 49 27 | stir-fr|ied!..I'|
|000042e0| 64 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 73 | 6f 6d 65 20 4a 55 4e 4b |d like s|ome JUNK|
|000042f0| 20 46 4f 4f 44 2e 2e 2e | 20 20 61 6e 64 20 74 68 | FOOD...|  and th|
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|00004310| 41 4c 4f 4e 45 20 2d 2d | 00 0a 49 27 6c 6c 20 65 |ALONE --|..I'll e|
|00004320| 61 74 20 41 4e 59 54 48 | 49 4e 47 20 74 68 61 74 |at ANYTH|ING that|
|00004330| 27 73 20 42 52 49 47 48 | 54 20 42 4c 55 45 21 21 |'s BRIGH|T BLUE!!|
|00004340| 00 0a 49 27 6c 6c 20 73 | 68 6f 77 20 79 6f 75 20 |..I'll s|how you |
|00004350| 4d 59 20 74 65 6c 65 78 | 20 6e 75 6d 62 65 72 20 |MY telex| number |
|00004360| 69 66 20 79 6f 75 20 73 | 68 6f 77 20 6d 65 20 59 |if you s|how me Y|
|00004370| 4f 55 52 53 2e 2e 2e 00 | 0a 49 27 6d 20 41 4e 4e |OURS....|.I'm ANN|
|00004380| 20 4c 41 4e 44 45 52 53 | 21 21 20 20 49 20 63 61 | LANDERS|!!  I ca|
|00004390| 6e 20 53 48 4f 50 4c 49 | 46 54 21 21 00 0a 49 27 |n SHOPLI|FT!!..I'|
|000043a0| 6d 20 44 45 53 50 4f 4e | 44 45 4e 54 2e 2e 2e 20 |m DESPON|DENT... |
|000043b0| 20 49 20 68 6f 70 65 20 | 74 68 65 72 65 27 73 20 | I hope |there's |
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|00005eb0| 46 6f 72 20 44 45 53 53 | 45 52 54 2c 20 49 27 6c |For DESS|ERT, I'l|
|00005ec0| 6c 20 68 61 76 65 20 61 | 20 54 4f 46 55 20 42 55 |l have a| TOFU BU|
|00005ed0| 52 47 45 52 20 77 69 74 | 68 20 42 45 41 4e 20 53 |RGER wit|h BEAN S|
|00005ee0| 50 52 4f 55 54 53 0a 20 | 6f 6e 20 61 20 73 74 6f |PROUTS. |on a sto|
|00005ef0| 6e 65 2d 67 72 6f 75 6e | 64 2c 20 57 48 4f 4c 45 |ne-groun|d, WHOLE|
|00005f00| 20 57 48 45 41 54 20 42 | 55 4e 21 21 00 0a 4d 72 | WHEAT B|UN!!..Mr|
|00005f10| 20 61 6e 64 20 4d 72 73 | 20 50 45 44 2c 20 63 61 | and Mrs| PED, ca|
|00005f20| 6e 20 49 20 62 6f 72 72 | 6f 77 20 32 36 2e 37 25 |n I borr|ow 26.7%|
|00005f30| 20 6f 66 20 74 68 65 20 | 52 41 59 4f 4e 20 54 45 | of the |RAYON TE|
|00005f40| 58 54 49 4c 45 20 70 72 | 6f 64 75 63 74 69 6f 6e |XTILE pr|oduction|
|00005f50| 0a 20 6f 66 20 74 68 65 | 20 49 4e 44 4f 4e 45 53 |. of the| INDONES|
|00005f60| 49 41 4e 20 61 72 63 68 | 69 70 65 6c 61 67 6f 3f |IAN arch|ipelago?|
|00005f70| 00 0a 4d 79 20 41 75 6e | 74 20 4d 41 55 52 45 45 |..My Aun|t MAUREE|
|00005f80| 4e 20 77 61 73 20 61 20 | 6d 69 6c 69 74 61 72 79 |N was a |military|
|00005f90| 20 61 64 76 69 73 6f 72 | 20 74 6f 20 49 4b 45 20 | advisor| to IKE |
|00005fa0| 26 20 54 49 4e 41 20 54 | 55 52 4e 45 52 21 21 00 |& TINA T|URNER!!.|
|00005fb0| 0a 4d 79 20 42 49 4f 4c | 4f 47 49 43 41 4c 20 41 |.My BIOL|OGICAL A|
|00005fc0| 4c 41 52 4d 20 43 4c 4f | 43 4b 20 6a 75 73 74 20 |LARM CLO|CK just |
|00005fd0| 77 65 6e 74 20 6f 66 66 | 2e 2e 20 20 49 74 20 68 |went off|..  It h|
|00005fe0| 61 73 20 6e 6f 69 73 65 | 6c 65 73 73 0a 20 44 4f |as noise|less. DO|
|00005ff0| 5a 45 20 46 55 4e 43 54 | 49 4f 4e 20 61 6e 64 20 |ZE FUNCT|ION and |
|00006000| 66 75 6c 6c 20 6b 69 74 | 63 68 65 6e 21 21 00 0a |full kit|chen!!..|
|00006010| 4d 79 20 43 4f 44 45 20 | 6f 66 20 45 54 48 49 43 |My CODE |of ETHIC|
|00006020| 53 20 69 73 20 76 61 63 | 61 74 69 6f 6e 69 6e 67 |S is vac|ationing|
|00006030| 20 61 74 20 66 61 6d 65 | 64 20 53 43 48 52 4f 4f | at fame|d SCHROO|
|00006040| 4e 20 4c 41 4b 45 0a 20 | 69 6e 20 75 70 73 74 61 |N LAKE. |in upsta|
|00006050| 74 65 20 4e 65 77 20 59 | 6f 72 6b 21 21 00 0a 4d |te New Y|ork!!..M|
|00006060| 79 20 45 41 52 53 20 61 | 72 65 20 47 4f 4e 45 21 |y EARS a|re GONE!|
|00006070| 21 00 0a 4d 79 20 4c 45 | 53 4c 49 45 20 47 4f 52 |!..My LE|SLIE GOR|
|00006080| 45 20 72 65 63 6f 72 64 | 20 69 73 20 42 52 4f 4b |E record| is BROK|
|00006090| 45 4e 2e 2e 00 0a 4d 79 | 20 66 61 63 65 20 69 73 |EN....My| face is|
|000060a0| 20 6e 65 77 2c 20 6d 79 | 20 6c 69 63 65 6e 73 65 | new, my| license|
|000060b0| 20 69 73 20 65 78 70 69 | 72 65 64 2c 20 61 6e 64 | is expi|red, and|
|000060c0| 20 49 27 6d 20 75 6e 64 | 65 72 20 61 20 64 6f 63 | I'm und|er a doc|
|000060d0| 74 6f 72 27 73 20 63 61 | 72 65 21 21 21 21 00 0a |tor's ca|re!!!!..|
|000060e0| 4d 79 20 68 61 69 72 63 | 75 74 20 69 73 20 74 6f |My hairc|ut is to|
|000060f0| 74 61 6c 6c 79 20 74 72 | 61 64 69 74 69 6f 6e 61 |tally tr|aditiona|
|00006100| 6c 21 00 0a 4d 79 20 6c | 69 66 65 20 69 73 20 61 |l!..My l|ife is a|
|00006110| 20 70 61 74 69 6f 20 6f | 66 20 66 75 6e 21 00 0a | patio o|f fun!..|
|00006120| 4d 79 20 6d 69 6e 64 20 | 69 73 20 61 20 70 6f 74 |My mind |is a pot|
|00006130| 61 74 6f 20 66 69 65 6c | 64 2e 2e 2e 00 0a 4d 79 |ato fiel|d.....My|
|00006140| 20 6d 69 6e 64 20 69 73 | 20 6d 61 6b 69 6e 67 20 | mind is| making |
|00006150| 61 73 68 74 72 61 79 73 | 20 69 6e 20 44 61 79 74 |ashtrays| in Dayt|
|00006160| 6f 6e 2e 2e 2e 2e 00 0a | 4d 79 20 6e 6f 73 65 20 |on......|My nose |
|00006170| 66 65 65 6c 73 20 6c 69 | 6b 65 20 61 20 62 61 64 |feels li|ke a bad|
|00006180| 20 52 6f 6e 61 6c 64 20 | 52 65 61 67 61 6e 20 6d | Ronald |Reagan m|
|00006190| 6f 76 69 65 2e 2e 2e 00 | 0a 4d 79 20 70 61 6e 74 |ovie....|.My pant|
|000061a0| 73 20 6a 75 73 74 20 77 | 65 6e 74 20 74 6f 20 68 |s just w|ent to h|
|000061b0| 69 67 68 20 73 63 68 6f | 6f 6c 20 69 6e 20 74 68 |igh scho|ol in th|
|000061c0| 65 20 43 61 72 6c 73 62 | 61 64 20 43 61 76 65 72 |e Carlsb|ad Caver|
|000061d0| 6e 73 21 21 21 00 0a 4d | 79 20 70 6f 6c 79 76 69 |ns!!!..M|y polyvi|
|000061e0| 6e 79 6c 20 63 6f 77 62 | 6f 79 20 77 61 6c 6c 65 |nyl cowb|oy walle|
|000061f0| 74 20 77 61 73 20 6d 61 | 64 65 20 69 6e 20 48 6f |t was ma|de in Ho|
|00006200| 6e 67 20 4b 6f 6e 67 20 | 62 79 20 4d 6f 6e 74 67 |ng Kong |by Montg|
|00006210| 6f 6d 65 72 79 20 43 6c | 69 66 74 21 00 0a 4d 79 |omery Cl|ift!..My|
|00006220| 20 75 6e 63 6c 65 20 4d | 75 72 72 61 79 20 63 6f | uncle M|urray co|
|00006230| 6e 71 75 65 72 65 64 20 | 45 67 79 70 74 20 69 6e |nquered |Egypt in|
|00006240| 20 35 33 20 42 2e 43 2e | 20 20 41 6e 64 20 49 20 | 53 B.C.|  And I |
|00006250| 63 61 6e 20 70 72 6f 76 | 65 20 69 74 20 74 6f 6f |can prov|e it too|
|00006260| 21 21 00 0a 4e 41 4e 43 | 59 21 21 20 20 57 68 79 |!!..NANC|Y!!  Why|
|00006270| 20 69 73 20 65 76 65 72 | 79 74 68 69 6e 67 20 52 | is ever|ything R|
|00006280| 45 44 3f 21 00 0a 4e 41 | 54 48 41 4e 2e 2e 2e 20 |ED?!..NA|THAN... |
|00006290| 20 79 6f 75 72 20 50 41 | 52 45 4e 54 53 20 77 65 | your PA|RENTS we|
|000062a0| 72 65 20 69 6e 20 61 20 | 43 41 52 43 52 41 53 48 |re in a |CARCRASH|
|000062b0| 21 21 0a 20 54 68 65 79 | 27 72 65 20 56 4f 49 44 |!!. They|'re VOID|
|000062c0| 45 44 20 2d 20 54 68 65 | 79 20 43 4f 4c 4c 41 50 |ED - The|y COLLAP|
|000062d0| 53 45 44 0a 20 54 68 65 | 79 20 68 61 64 20 6e 6f |SED. The|y had no|
|000062e0| 20 43 48 41 49 4e 53 41 | 57 53 2e 2e 2e 20 20 54 | CHAINSA|WS...  T|
|000062f0| 68 65 79 20 68 61 64 20 | 6e 6f 20 4d 4f 4e 45 59 |hey had |no MONEY|
|00006300| 20 4d 41 43 48 49 4e 45 | 53 2e 2e 2e 0a 20 54 68 | MACHINE|S.... Th|
|00006310| 65 79 20 64 69 64 20 50 | 49 4c 4c 53 20 69 6e 20 |ey did P|ILLS in |
|00006320| 53 4b 49 4d 50 59 20 47 | 52 41 53 53 20 53 4b 49 |SKIMPY G|RASS SKI|
|00006330| 52 54 53 2e 2e 2e 0a 20 | 4e 61 74 68 61 6e 2c 20 |RTS.... |Nathan, |
|00006340| 49 20 45 4d 55 4c 41 54 | 45 44 20 74 68 65 6d 2e |I EMULAT|ED them.|
|00006350| 2e 2e 20 20 62 75 74 20 | 74 68 65 79 20 77 65 72 |..  but |they wer|
|00006360| 65 20 4f 46 46 2d 4b 45 | 59 2e 2e 2e 00 0a 4e 45 |e OFF-KE|Y.....NE|
|00006370| 57 41 52 4b 20 68 61 73 | 20 62 65 65 6e 20 52 45 |WARK has| been RE|
|00006380| 5a 4f 4e 45 44 21 21 20 | 20 44 45 53 20 4d 4f 49 |ZONED!! | DES MOI|
|00006390| 4e 45 53 20 68 61 73 20 | 62 65 65 6e 20 52 45 5a |NES has |been REZ|
|000063a0| 4f 4e 45 44 21 21 00 0a | 4e 6f 74 20 53 45 4e 53 |ONED!!..|Not SENS|
|000063b0| 55 4f 55 53 2e 2e 2e 20 | 20 6f 6e 6c 79 20 60 60 |UOUS... | only ``|
|000063c0| 46 52 4f 4c 49 43 53 4f | 4d 45 27 27 2e 2e 2e 0a |FROLICSO|ME''....|
|000063d0| 20 61 6e 64 20 69 6e 20 | 6e 65 65 64 20 6f 66 20 | and in |need of |
|000063e0| 44 45 4e 54 41 4c 20 57 | 4f 52 4b 2e 2e 2e 20 20 |DENTAL W|ORK...  |
|000063f0| 69 6e 20 50 41 49 4e 21 | 21 21 00 0a 4e 6f 77 20 |in PAIN!|!!..Now |
+--------+-------------------------+-------------------------+--------+--------+